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You can’t win with a horse carriage when everyone else is driving cars.

"Dating with science" means using the scientific method to approach dating, which involves making hypotheses about what you want, collecting data through observation and experience, and using those insights to make better choices.

This involves self-reflection, testing different approaches, and focusing on building genuine connections through activities like shared experiences and curiosity-driven conversations.

Keep a dating log:

Document your experiences, observations, and thoughts in a journal to identify recurring patterns in your attractions and relationship dynamics.

Note what works:

Observe which traits or behaviors led to successful or unsuccessful connections in your past relationships.

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Reflect on your dating history:

Analyze your past to understand who you are consistently drawn to and why.

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Define what you want:

Based on your observations, form a hypothesis about what you're looking for in a partner. This can be a specific "type" of person or a set of desired traits and behaviors.

Consider your "ideal" partner:

Think about how your ideal partner would behave and what they would value. This can help you identify potential matches more easily.

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Go on dates with intention:

Instead of just mindlessly swiping, go on dates with the intention of testing your hypotheses and seeing if they hold up in practice.

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Test different approaches:

Try new approaches, like being more proactive in pursuing people or using dating apps intentionally, rather than waiting for love to "strike like a lightning bolt".

Look for signs of chemistry:

Focus on finding someone who truly listens and engages in a back-and-forth conversation, as this is a strong indicator of "chemistry" and connection.

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Evaluate the outcome:

After dates, analyze the results to see if the person met your criteria and if the connection felt genuine. Did they "pass your test"?

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Adjust your hypothesis:

If a date didn't go as planned, don't be discouraged. Instead, use it as an opportunity to refine your hypothesis and learn more about what you truly want.

Focus on building connection:

Once you find a promising match, focus on building a genuine connection by engaging in new, shared activities and maintaining curiosity about each other.

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Understand relationships require work:

Recognize that a good relationship requires effort from both sides, not just the initial spark.